Own a Musket for Home Defense meme example.

Own a Musket for Home Defense

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Updated Feb 01, 2024 at 12:19PM EST by Zach.

Added Nov 21, 2022 at 04:16PM EST by Philipp.

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Related Explainer: Why Own A Musket For Home Defense? The 'Just As The Founding Fathers Intended' Copypasta Explained

About

Own a Musket for Home Defense, also known as Since That's What the Founding Fathers Intended, refers to a copypasta about a person defending his house against four robbers by shooting them with a musket and other outdated weaponry. Originating from a 2014 4chan discussion about using muskets for home defense purposes, the copypasta has since inspired numerous viral videos and memes over the years.

Origin

On November 14th, 2014, an anonymous 4chan[1] user started a /k/ thread, writing, "serious question: how good is a musket for home defense?" In the thread, another user posted[2] a greentext story imagining a person defending his home against two robbers with a musket, killing one by "putting a basketball-sized hole in him" and the other by stabbing him with a bayonet (shown below).


Anonymous 11/14/14(Fri)16:45:38 No.23597742 >>23598046 >Buy musket for home defense >Finally one night I hear a crash >Dawn my powdered wig and petticoat >musket is ready to fire. >my home surround sound is also primed and ready to play "The Royal Hussars" >Hit play >"TALLÉY HO LADS!" >run downstairs and into my living room >two men are carrying my T.V. >put a basketball sized hole in one >The other attempts to drop my T.V and run >"AFIX BAYONETS GENTLEMEN" >Charge after him >Jam my bayonet into his anus as he tries to climb back through a broken window. >call police >have tea ready for them.

Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball-sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbor's dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grapeshot, "Tally ho lads" the grapeshot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

On December 8th, 2014, Redditor iBleeedorange posted a screenshot of the post to the /r/4chan[3] subreddit, where it gained over 14,000 upvotes in eight years with the image being widely reposted in the following years.

Spread

On June 27th, 2016, an anonymous 4chan user posted a rewritten version of the copypasta in a /k/[4] thread (shown below, left). Sometime prior to September 23rd that year, an unknown user posted a slightly reworded version of the copypasta to Facebook with a screenshot of that post going viral (shown below, right).[5]


>Be me >Be sleeping >Hear a window smash at 3:49am >Grab my home defense musket because that's what the founding fathers intended when they wrote the second amendment 32 KB JPG >Run out of the room and see two masked men >Fire musket at first one, blows a hole a foot in diameter in him >He's dead on the spot >Musket ball continues to fly wildly going through my neighbor's wall and nails his dog >Grab my flintlock pistol and fire it at the second man >Musket ball misses entirely because is smoothbore >Ball goes through other neighbors house and destroys his TV >Fix Bayonet to musket and jab the second guy 15 times >Reload my musket in case any more rapscallions arrive >Police knock and enter upon hearing the ruckus >Can't hear or see because of the flintlocks report >Mistakenly shoot the police officer >Stabbed guy bleeds out at the hospital after using four pints of blood because triangle bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up >Just as the founding fathers intended. Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

On October 29th, 2018, Redditor Green272 posted this version of the copypasta to the /r/copypasta[6] subreddit, where it received over 30,400 upvotes in four years.

On February 10th, 2019, YouTuber[7] Mousey Poo posted a humorous video based on the copypasta that gained over 49,000 views in three years (shown below, left). On November 5th, 2020, YouTube[8] user Gearhead posted a humorous animation that garnered over 2 million views in two years (shown below, right).



The copypasta maintained its popularity in the early 2020s as users continued to share it and use it as source material for animations and other videos.

Various Examples




Search Interest

External References

Recent Videos 8 total

Recent Images 7 total



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