Dan Wilson

Location: Interwebs

Joined Dec 23, 2016 at 12:19PM EST

Contributions

About

Yeah hi, my name is Dan Wilson. This number used to be for a video thing? I gotta video from you guys, it's called DOG SITTER. It gave me a great idea, ya see, I run Iowas largest wildlife preserve, and I wanna produce a video for GIRAFFES! Just imagine how many zoos are in this country! I gotta idea ya see, it's like this, were gonna build all these platforms in downtown Manhattan, and we're gonna walk guys around with cameras and its gonna be like a giraffes night out in Manhattan, all these platforms are gonna be 15 feet in the air. We're gonna put it on a D-V-D! And ah uh I know those kids like the torrents. So I wanna bombard every D-V-D with solar radiation. I think that'll create some kind of MAGNETRON, and if anyone tries to copy the video its gonna be like a beam is gonna fly right into their eyes like Raiders of the Lost Ark! And…And hold on they've come back, let me go…(Whats going on?! Get away form my door!)…Hey uh hold on I gotta go shoot some guys! I'll talk to you later! My name's DON WILSON. I RUN IOWAS LARGEST WILDLIFE PRESERVE!

Why are you here? Why are you looking at my profile page? Are you bored? Did you recognized the reference of my name and avatar? Were you intrigued by a comment or post of mine just wanted to find out more, maybe by instinct? There's a word-for-word copypasta of the Best of the Worst prank call in the description, and a gif of Zant from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess spinning at an irregular speed, faster than any point in the game, and he has no friends, followers, and isn't following anybody, is this person a shit-poster? Jesus, did I say that? Or think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?

Who am I really?
aHR0cHM6Ly90aW55dXJsLmNvbS9xNDRkb3VrCg==